102 » i can't find myself after all they did

[spiralabyss]

[ The traveler's birthday was, of course, a cause for great celebration.

How often does one get the chance to celebrate the birth of a hero, after all? In an attempt to satisfy all of the many people he's met — the many people throughout Teyvat who have grown to love him — Aether spent the morning in Liyue and the evening in Mondstadt, but that worked perfectly well for Kaeya, whose idea of gaiety involved making the poor boy sample every single cocktail offered at the Angel's Share. Now that it's legal, he'd teased, I need to make sure you've experienced every delight that adult life has to offer.

Honestly, he wasn't even being subtle at that point. It's a mark of how naïve Jean and Amber can be that no one thought twice about what he was really saying.

Anyway, Aether had... curious reactions. The traveler was clearly faking inebriation from the start. Real beginner drinkers usually remark on the burn of alcohol, the odd taste of it; Aether seemed more than familiar with the complex smoke of whiskey, the sweet subtleties of wine. He didn't actually start to get drunk until about the fourth or fifth cocktail made. By the seventh, he was feigning sleepiness, pretending to fall asleep on Venti's shoulder, but Kaeya knew better. He probably could have gone on drinking for the next few hours.

But Diluc had looked Kaeya in the eyes, sharply, and told him to stop messing around and get the boy to bed.

The captain could have thanked his brother in response.

Well, barely legal or not — and while Kaeya wouldn't mind the former at all, or not is what he suspects at this point in time — he's more than happy to sling a "sleepy" Aether over his shoulder and walk him back to the Knights of Favonius headquarters to rest. Margaret spots them on the way back and giggles; Kaeya stops rubbing his thumb over Aether's hipbone then, puts up his usual sterling mask, asks her how business is doing at the Cat's Tail, wishes her a good night. The minute she turns around, he's sliding his fingers over the curve of Aether's waistline again, fingers slipping past the golden trim on his waistband to invade the line between the traveler's thigh and groin.

The minute they get into a dark bedroom in the Favonius barracks, Kaeya deposits Aether on the bed there, pausing to brush his golden hair out of his eyes. ]

You're awfully cute like this.

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[spiralabyss]

[Aether's unraveling. Good, Kaeya thinks, through a pleasant haze of alcohol that is finally starting to set in now that he's had a minute to process all the cocktails he'd knocked back at the Angel's Share. It's nothing the Cavalry Captain can't handle, but it makes him more reckless than usual, which is something most people don't pick up on, since he does a good job of making it seem as though he's always reckless.

Suddenly hitching his breath in his throat, Kaeya changes his mind capriciously, abruptly wrapping his lips around Aether's length after all. A few swift and steady bobs orient him, and then he doesn't need the thumb and forefinger wrapped around the traveler's base to keep him in place; loving and diligent and impossibly generous, Kaeya moves up and down over Aether's cock, swallowing and hollowing his cheeks in a way that leave the traveler no choice but to coat the knight's tongue in sweet, heady cum.

Just a little more, he thinks. Just a little more. But it's never enough, really, and he knows he's kidding himself. The thought of being able to deflower Aether all over again has him firmly in its grasp.]

[ironwind]

[Oh, it's so easy to give in, to let Kaeya taste the sweetness of his surrender. The Cavalry Captain's hands are pinning Aether's thighs to the mattress, holding his hips in place so that he can't escape even if he tried — though it's not as though he would. Why would anyone want to escape such paradise, such bliss?

The traveler's protests melt like morning frost into frigid waters; soon, only delicate moans and whimpers escape him despite that he was desperately asking why only a moment ago. Over and over again his hips buck, thrusting into Kaeya's hot, wet mouth, the way the knight-captain's tongue keeps sliding up and over and around and under and left and right and right there right there against the impossibly sensitive tip of his cock, and he doesn't actually realize that his hands have slid into the roots of Kaeya's hair until he feels himself squeezing those navy-blue strands into the sensitive spaces between his fingers. He's coming, he's coming, he's coming, and it feels so good —]

K-Kaeya —

[He thinks he knows what it is now; he thinks he understands. It might be the birthday, or the drinks, or something else, but what Kaeya wants tonight is to shatter him, leave him senseless. It's not his place to know why; it's just his place to submit and enjoy it. The questions, the protests — they'll do nothing for him now.]

[spiralabyss]

[Kaeya swallows every little jolt of Aether's body, all the way down to the hilt; it's not as though the traveler's cock is small, but it's a delicate little thing, and all too easy to slip it past the resistance in his throat until it's snugly cushioned against Kaeya's voicebox, pumped dry by the incessant wiggling and twitching and flicking of Kaeya's tongue. Aether comes to pieces in Kaeya's mouth and it tastes like heaven, tastes like a dream. And Kaeya, Kaeya's the sort of man who likes it dirty and sordid and selfish — but sometimes, it feels so good to be perfect for someone else.

He remembers being eighteen. There had been a merchant from Liyue, all gorgeous curves and long legs at the bar, and Crepus had been cold in the grave maybe some two or three months. Diluc was gods-only-know-where, and if he'd been in a better frame of mind at the time, maybe Kaeya wouldn't have bothered. But they talked; she was interested. Through their conversation, he'd made sure she wouldn’t ever be back to Mondstadt. She was on her way to Fontaine for a four-year apprenticeship, or something like that; he didn't know, he didn't care. It was sloppy and awkward and messy, and she'd teased him for looking better than he was. Left in half-disgust. And afterward, the ache in his body had been satisfied, but the ache in his heart still felt like ice in his chest.

He doesn't want it to be like that for anyone else. Doesn't want it to be like that for Aether especially. He comes up with Aether's cum still in his mouth — smirks and smiles, swirls it around in his mouth like a heady cocktail before making a show of swallowing it down. His Adam's apple bobs with the movement.

Like this, it's perfect. Like this, Aether can be eighteen, even if he isn't, and Kaeya can be his fantasy, even if he isn't.

Only slightly breathless, Kaeya says nothing for once. He doesn't tease, doesn't gloat. Instead, he just leans down, bringing the traveler's taste to the traveler's tongue, and every kiss feels like absolution for the guilt of sins too old to be pardoned.

He finds Aether's hands with his fingers. He pins the traveler down.]

[ironwind]

[He doesn't like it when Kaeya plays him like a fiddle, but Aether can't help but admit that his arousal spikes at the sight of the man despite the fact that he just came; the sight of what he's spilled into Kaeya's mouth is just too lovely to resist. Pure, creamy white contrasted against the pink of his tongue and the red of his mouth and the tan of his skin — it's enough to make Aether swallow with unbridled thirst even as he watches Kaeya swallow his seed.

The traveler is a man, despite all appearances. He has needs. He has wants. He likes to submit, but he wants to make Kaeya submit just as much. If he could have his way, he'd grab hold of Kaeya's hair and thrust messily into the Captain's mouth until he really had his fill.

Before he can do that, though, the knight is upon him, kissing him and pinning him against the bed despite that he's already lying back, boneless from his release. Aether doesn't resist; he's realized by now that Kaeya doesn't want him to resist. It's his birthday, and this is his time to relax and enjoy himself. And maybe Kaeya has a reason to want birthdays to be special — maybe maybe maybe.

Aether doesn't think about it. Can't, given how good he feels. He closes his eyes into the kiss, coming down from the high of his orgasm, his mind pleasantly hazy, his body deliciously spent. But he's not drained, not by a long shot — he can't do much with his arms, given that they're being pinned down, but he hooks his ankles around Kaeya's back, "pinning" Kaeya down in his own way.

It takes a long, long moment — a good long moment to enjoy the soft wet silk of Kaeya's tongue flicking and licking over his own — but when they finally, finally part for breath, gasping softly and heaving with need, Aether wrests one of his wrists free, brushing his thumb lightly along the knight's bottom lip.]

...Satisfied now?

[He knows the answer can't be yes, but he wonders if Kaeya is himself aware of how he's acting. It's not an unwelcome sight on him, but it's oddly manic.]

[spiralabyss]

[Aether tastes like heaven on Kaeya's tongue — all the more so when the knowledge that the traveler must be able to taste himself fills Kaeya with an exceptionally perverse pleasure. The knight has never before felt the desire to please and corrupt so acutely; he wants to drown Aether in ecstasy, wants to slowly coach the traveler through doing increasingly filthy things, "teach" him even though he knows full well that the traveler doesn't need teaching.

Still: why not, for just one night? Why not indulge this fantasy to its fullest extent? Who but Aether would let Kaeya use his body like this, with such strangely selfish and reckless abandon? Anyone else, they'd let their egos get in the way. They'd expect him to be charming and sparkling and full of witty repartee even in the middle of this. The traveler, on the other hand, doesn't ask questions.]

...Not by a long shot.

[Fiercely, he kisses Aether one more time, then presses his body down against the traveler's, letting out a relieved breath he's slightly ashamed of. It's easier for him to ignore that he's hard when he's trapped in his obscenely tight pants, but as things stand, he's been aching for some time now, and he thinks he's nearing his limit. He buries his face in Aether's neck, licking a short stripe along the traveler's collarbones; his cock moves smoothly back and forth over the blond's silky thighs, seeking friction and release.]

Meant to tease you a bit more, but — [A shaky laugh, a grateful groan; he thinks he might be able to come just like this, if Aether pressed his thighs together and let Kaeya go wild...] I don't think I can hold back any longer.

[His expression steels over just the faintest bit, his gaze icy when he looks into Aether's patient eyes and finds the audacity to demand more. He releases the traveler's wrists.]

Get on top. I want to see every inch of you.

[ironwind]

[Get on top, Kaeya says, and despite the fact that Aether doesn't think of himself as particularly submissive, some primal instinct makes him obey, has him straddle Kaeya's surprisingly shapely hips and tease the head of the knight's cock with his thighs. The man is so strikingly gorgeous, all the more so now that he's unraveling ever so subtly and a touch of color is darkening his tan cheeks. Coquettishly, Aether rubs his fingers over the wet slit at the head of Kaeya's cock, teasing him all the more, as if the veins bulging and throbbing out of his cock aren't indication enough of how badly he wants release.]

Do you want me to ride you?

I wanted — [He bites his lip. It's too late; he's already said it, and Kaeya's clearly at his limit, wants to come already.] I wanted you to... to finger me until I came.

[He hastens toward an apology, blushing faintly — this despite the fact that Kaeya's already made him come, and done far more filthy things to achieve it, besides.]

I mean, I'll do whatever you want right now, but...

[spiralabyss]

[ He did decide that he wasn't going to hold back any longer, but — hearing Aether actually ask to come one more time sends a new flare of need rushing through him, the burn hotter and finer than that at the bottom of any glass of whiskey. It makes Kaeya's cock throb so hard that he actually hisses with arousal, and as much as he wants to just slam the traveler's hips down over his own and churn Aether's insides until he tastes sweet release, he's a gentleman first and foremost. How can he refuse when he's been asked so nicely?

And so, with a sigh that almost turns into a faint growl, Kaeya pulls down on one of Aether's arms, hard enough to make the traveler collapse into his chest; wrapping one arm around the outlander's shoulders so that he can't get away, he works his fingers in past Aether's entrance and curls his knuckles in just the right way — he could finger-fuck Aether hard enough to make him cry, he knows, but he's working a gentle, steady pace in spite of how hard he himself is at the moment.

It's almost enough to make him grit his teeth. Just long enough until he comes once, he tells himself. Just once — ]

You dirty whore.

[ It's half-breathed and even a little delirious; he's impatient, can't wait, curves and thrusts his fingers even faster. There's a sense of empowerment to this, too, though; he feels vaguely as though Aether is just a toy for him to play with and use, and it's so gratifying, the thought that he only needs his fingers to get Aether off. ]

You've wanted this from the start, haven't you?

[ironwind]

A-Ah — I've wanted —

[Aether wants to agree, to admit to it — he wants to concede that he's Kaeya's dirty little whore — but he can barely even think once the captain's fingers are curled inside of him, milking his prostate in a way that makes his cock throb every time his insides are pushed and prodded. If the knight wanted to, he could just as easily be rough, but he's fingering Aether in just the way that he needs to get off — this isn't about Kaeya's pleasure, but Aether's, and the traveler can't recall anyone else in all the worlds who ever treated him so well as he closes his eyes to keep them from rolling back in pleasure as he moans and pleads —]

W-Wanted — this — [Kaeya's fingers curve just right, and he gasps, he throbs] — Kaeya...!

[That's it, that's all he needed: just the steady pulse of Kaeya's long, slender fingers inside of him for a few seconds. That's all it takes to send him spilling over the edge, dripping his eager juices all over the Cavalry Captain's delectably toned abdomen, melting into a haze of pleasure he normally never lets his sharp mind sink into.

Yes, this is it — this was what he wanted.]

K-Kaeya...

[spiralabyss]

[Aether will have to forgive him just this once.

Well, and maybe a few more times after this, too.

Feeling the traveler squeeze tight around his fingers is just more than Kaeya can take right now; he's already aching with need, so much so that a fine mist of sweat is beading over the back of his neck despite the way he usually runs cool and unbothered, and there's nothing he wants more than to be sheathed inside Aether, feeling that tight wet heat around the veins throbbing in his cock instead of his bare fingers. Cursing under his breath, Kaeya impatiently finger-fucks Aether through his orgasm for a few glorious seconds before he decides the traveler's had more than enough — and he'll have some more after this, anyway.

It's time for him to have a little taste of pleasure, too. Gripping the traveler's hips, Kaeya positions Aether over his cock and then sinks gratefully into him, breath hitching when the traveler's opening takes the tip of his cock and then slides blissfully down. Oh, if that doesn't feel heavenly. Kaeya rocks his hips once, sending rays of pleasure arching through his head; the breath he takes is ragged and bestial, barely human. It could belong to a creature of the Abyss.]

Ngh... You're so tight...

[Smug laughter punctuates that statement — but he's been more than patient enough, he thinks. He wouldn't do anything if he thought Aether would actually be in terrible pain, of course, but he knows the traveler is nowhere near that limit. Heedless of the Honorary Knight's recovery — whether he's still riding out the last waves of his orgasm or he's too sensitive to be fucked — Kaeya slowly starts to fuck in earnest, bouncing the traveler up and down on his lap, letting out ragged little gasps each time Aether's impossibly silky insides rub up against his cock just right.]

Nngh — hah, yeah...

[ironwind]

[Aether's barely off the high of his orgasm when he feels Kaeya slip and hilt inside of him just right, and it's all so overwhelming that he feels himself keening before he hears the sound of his own voice. The long, grateful moan that escapes him despite his best efforts isn't anything that he recognizes from his own throat, but the hot, demanding pressure of Kaeya's cock inside of him prevents him from lingering too long on that embarrassed thought.

Then suddenly he's moving, or rather being moved — Kaeya's thick cock is sliding in and out of his body, making him feel hot and unbearably hard again despite the way he's just come — and it's all Aether can do to just wrap his arms around the Cavalry Captain's broad, tan shoulders and cling to every wave of pleasure as it comes. The hot, wet gasping of Kaeya's breath against his ear has him feeling outrageously desirous, dizzy with need. He isn't sure how to convince himself to let go.

He doesn't even mind the way that he's being used.]

Kaeya — [a little sigh, a breath of his own, and then he squeezes, just the barest bit, to see if he can make Kaeya spill over] — do you feel good...?

[spiralabyss]

Good...?

[He could almost muster a laugh for the absurdity of the question. Aether is being so ludicrous that he simply meets the traveler with a low chuckle, another eager roll of his hips that sends ecstasy trickling down his spine. The feeling of at last getting friction around his aching cock feels impossibly sweet; it's almost so good that Kaeya swears he can taste it, every bit as intoxicating as the last bit of Death After Noon at the bottom of a glass. He would be a fool to let his guard down entirely — but in the moment, he lets himself indulge the delirious impulse of slamming his cock into Aether over and over and over again, letting primal instinct take over in a way that he rarely allows.]

I feel better than good... Amazing, even...

[Experience tells him that he ought to go slow and steady, take Aether apart in a gentle and meticulous fashion, but in the moment, selfishly, he doesn't want to. Aether is just so damn tight, so tight and wet and eager, and the traveler looks at him with those needy, honey-gold eyes and he's letting his breath fade into ragged gasps and he just wants to burst —

— so he does, quickening his pace to a breakneck bucking of his hips that might be almost painful if not for the way he knows he's hitting Aether's sweet spot, his one uncovered eye solely fixed on the slight part of Aether's lips as he fucks into his lusciously welcoming body, both hands wrapped around Aether's slender waist, handling him like a toy.

He comes with a shaky gasp —]

[ironwind]

[— and Aether wraps his arms tightly around him to accept it, nails digging into Kaeya's shoulders as he takes in every last drop of the knight's release.

Better than good. Amazing. It's so reassuring to hear Kaeya of all people say something like that — so comforting to have the knight pressed into him, gasping quietly for breath and squeezing his waist; the traveler has already come so many times tonight, but he already feels another orgasm welling up from the tight knot of pleasure in his belly. Kaeya's hips are slowing to a halt as he's overwhelmed by his orgasm, but even so, he's fucking Aether so hard that the traveler's entering that exquisite realm of extended orgasm where it feels like he's coming again and again and again...

Aether surrenders once more, whimpering softly as he shivers and comes. The thin white rope of cum that emerges stains Kaeya's tan skin, but the traveler pays that no mind as his lips latch on to Kaeya's neck and he sucks a sweet little hickey into it, right where his collar will cover it up later, and leave them both a secret they can keep together.]

Mmn...

[Satisfied, and perhaps venting just ever-so-subtly about the way he was used like a toy, Aether comes up from the lovebite with a smug smirk on his face, boneless and fucked-out and happy.]

...Satisfied now, I take it?